Nature Versus Nurture: Who takes responsibility for you?

From one of my favourite poems, do check it out in full.

From one of my favourite poems, do check it out in full.

Life. It’s a funny old thing.

Ask yourself, are you the kind of person who sees themselves as a victim when things go wrong, or are you the kind who realizes it could (nearly always) be much worse, and thanks their lucky stars for what they do have?

Our experiences, and our reactions to them, are all relative. If your life has been relatively smooth sailing, then that’s wonderful. But perhaps, because it’s been so smooth, you are not actively thankful for it – because you haven’t even realised?

Alternatively, if your life has been hard, then perhaps you recognize the little things, and are able to take joy in the minutiae of your day?

It seems, to me, that it doesn’t do to be too greedy in life. We all want things – love, friendship, material comfort, a home. But if you have too much, and you take it for granted, then maybe it hits you that much harder when it’s gone.

I often read articles in which a person says that they ‘never thought it would happen to me’ – and I am quite envious of that attitude, in a strange way, because at least they’ve lived the rest of their life in blissful ignorance.

I, on the other hand, am the kind of person who assumes it will always happen to me! In part this is due to a variety of childhood circumstances, ranging from family alcoholism, parental bereavement, domestic violence and divorce. I have an overt recognition therefore that ‘it’ can – and does – happen to anyone.

However, I would also say that I am extremely lucky. I had a very happy childhood, with strong love from my parents and grandparents. I subsequently have a good grasp on the things that matter, and an equally strong sense of independence and gritty determination.

I am organized to a fault – perhaps a throwback to previous chaos– and I believe in standing up for other people. I don’t believe that I am anyone else’s responsibility, and I probably take on too much responsibility sometimes for others.

I am a worrier, a pre-empter, and a control freak. I am a bookworm and a writer and a lover of words.

Have you ever asked yourself who you are, and why? In terms of nature versus nurture, I probably come out 50/50. Our families have much to answer for in this debate, but the real responsibility lies with just one person: you.


2 thoughts on “Nature Versus Nurture: Who takes responsibility for you?

  1. I’m way too introspective, so I think about this stuff all the time. And as you described yourself, it was as if you were describing me. I, too, have lived through a whole lot of nasty stuff, and so I now feel as if good things are practically a miracle, which I would never take for granted. And I half expect disaster around every corner, because disaster has been almost a constant in my adult life…but at the same time I’ve had great joy in my adult life.
    Interesting post!

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